I’ve Been Blocked!

Confessions of a Nice Girl

A thing happened this morning, a dark and mysterious thing that probably happens to everyone but has never happened to me (as far as I know) because (I have always assumed) I’m a nice girl. It’s true. Most of the people in my life will confirm that I am, at the very least, nice.

It’s a weak little qualifier, nice, one that carries no baggage at all and leaves no mess behind. Nice means k, or fine (the meh fine, not the all that fine), or even straight-up boring. Nice is whatever, but nice girls don’t get blocked. Right?!

Well, this nice girl must have stepped in something because I seem to be officially blocked. The scoop: I got a notification that said Miss Faceless Avatar had responded to something I wrote. Here is that something —

I went to read the response and it’s not there, so I followed the trail to the user’s profile and saw the blocked message thing — my maiden block.

I have never seen this before, because nice girls aren’t allowed. At first, I was confused (nice girls can be a little slow) — what can this mean? I had that annoying moment that I’m entirely too familiar with when I wondered, Why doesn’t she like me? But then — then — the real work began. This is power. I am right and someone that I’m not married to didn’t like it and boohoo. I’m such a beast, such a wondrous destructive force (for good), that she had to block me to avoid ever being scorched by my magnificence again!

A monster is born!

It makes a little sense, I guess. The essay is a political rant and people who have a difficult time marshalling their thoughts and managing their emotions can’t handle it. I stomp and flail about idiots talking politics all the time. I’ve never blocked them though — I’m expert at the art of ignoring, the craft of the cold shoulder. Don’t like it? Don’t look.

That supposedly incendiary essay has started little fires under a few responders, people who said things like the following —

Like fleas on a dog, parasites like you bite with false assertions to infest and putrefy Medium’s purpose.

The problem is that you have no credibility.

I wish you would go away …

I’m a little wounded but I’m a lot delighted. Little old me! Infesting and putrefying Medium’s purpose!

I AM DRUNK WITH POWER ON A WEDNESDAY MORNING!

I struck nerves and now I will never go away! Plus, I’m right. All I said is that the Huckster lies. Every day. She does! She so absolutely, verifiably lies every single day and why aren’t we all in the streets? You don’t have to like me (even though I’m nice), you don’t have to agree with my politics, but you’re an idiot if you can’t see through the swiss cheese lies that are handed out like so many baloney sandwiches by this administration every single day.

Who is so sensitive that they need to block my mild take on a political moment? What are you afraid of, Miss Blocky Snowflake? Is the pen really mightier than the sword? Maybe I should get a sword now. I can’t be stopped.

Update: I logged in as my husband (because I’m a bad girl now) to see the response of the woman who deemed me blockable. What have I done to cause her to eliminate my voice from the world wide web? Her response, in toto —

Poppycock!!!!!

Oh my god she’s a nice girl. So many exclamations! Poppycock?! Did I hurt her? I was hoping that my blocker was a worthy opponent. I’ve been challenged with poppycock now? The drunk with power thing is burning off quick. Maybe I’m a little less nice. And I’m still right.

Write it down.

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